insomnia or the jitterbug .?

Just a few hours from now , our school will have a field trip . And I will join . ( No surprise about that .) And not an hour earlier , I finished packing my things . Now , i'm supposed to be sleeping . But OBVIOUSLY i'm writing this blog . Unless I was someone else . Huh .? How could that be .? Insane .!! I don't know what else to do to be able to sleep . And I don't know if this is caused by insomnia or the jitterbug . Am I too excited for the field trip later or i'm just sick again . Anyways , it hurts right now . I don't want any of my blogs to be emo . But I just can't help it . Why does this need to happen .? Pesky me .! I shouldn't even have gone deeper into him so that it wouldn't hurt this much . I discovered so many things . I know more about him than I thought I would ever know . But part of what I discovered about him is her . They're not actually together but they are an item . Ouch .! It hurts again .! Hay . Cruel life I have been given . I know that he doesn't readmy blogs so i'm safe . Unless you will sell me up . It's up to you . Hahah .! And for those who doesn't know him , much better if you won't . It's nonsense . It is rarely noticed . Unsignificant . So rathe not talk about it . Ok .? Especially with him . How I wish he feels the same way too . But what if he really _______ her .? Wth will I do .? Pretend as if i'm not affected and go on with my life or I will go away from him now to avoid further hurting .? Insomnia , or jitterbug, whatev .! I hate you .! You made me do this . If not for you , I supposedly am asleep right now . Not thinking about him and it .! F*ck .!