money-slash-mommy matters

Yesterday, we had an activity at school. 'Twas a seminar about how to save money, free yourself from financial freedom, etc. and hosted by a guy named Chinkee Tan. He's an entrepreneur from what I hear from the teachers and he was an actor before - our adviser had said so. Usually, those who speak at seminars held at school ask for a talent fee [or is that really what they call it?] But he didn't. 'Coz according to our Math teacher, he just wanted to share with us the tips he'd learned from experience. He was a big shot actor back then, earned soo much money, lost more money, and became a successful entrepreneur now. And he just wants to share to the world - in the form of his book - numerous ways to budget money and state his steps to financial freedom.
Now, because he doesn't ask for a fee, our teachers told us that if our parents attend the seminar, we'll have a +2o on ALL our CGAT^[1] exams. For our adviser, however, she wants us to be there, too. For our Math teacher, he wants us to buy a book and have it signed and addressed to us by Mr. Chingkee Tan himself for us to avail of a bonus +2o again. To clear things up, they are not forcing us to go or to buy, they just want us to support Mr. Tan's cause and hence, give him a fee that he did not ask for . So this event was really big. Days before the seminar, I informed my mom so that she could cancel all her appointments that day and devote her time to go to school. 'Twas already planned the night before.
The following day, I woke up at 7am and was waiting for her to come home [since she was a call center agent and their shifts were at night]. 'Twas 9am already and my mom hadn't come home yet and my cousin and aunt woke up. They informed me that my cousin had a schedule with the dentist today and she wanted me to come with them, too. It was still early ['coz the card-giving would start at 2pm and the seminar would start at 4pm] so I said yes. When my mom came home, it was already 1pm and if we went with my aunt, cousin, and uncle to the dentist, I worried that we would be late for the card-giving and the seminar. Consequently, I couldn't get my card anymore and bye-bye +2o and +4o. So I said to my mom that if we still decide to go, we should come home at 3pm and go directly to school. Then my aunt butted-in and said, "Are you insane?! It's already 1pm. We'll go home at 7pm!!! HAHA." I was soo f*ck*ng irritated with the answer so I started to cry. You ever get the feeling that you're so irritated with the people around you and you can't do anything to them 'coz you're civilized and you just start to cry? Well I do, all the time. So I went to the terrace, plugged in my earphone and closed my eyes for a bit. But still, the tears did not subdue. So I went inside, and rested on the couch . I pretended to sleep eventhough the pillow I rested my head on was already soaking wet. My mom shrugged me and asked me if I still want to go. I ignored her and I heard her say to my cousin that they should ignore me.
Anyways, I can't stop crying so I decided that I should sleep 'coz that's the only way I could breath 'coz it was getting harder and harder to do so as another minute passes by. When I woke up, the car wasn't parked in the garage anymore so I figured they left already. I transferred to my room and slept again 'coz the tears were resurfacing. When I woke up again, 'twas already 5pm. And I was supposed to go to church at 6pm. After all that happened that day, I decided that I wasn't ready to face the world yet so I didn't come yet. Good thing that my bestfriend texted me and asked me if i'll come to church. I said to him that i'll go later in the evening. Being true to my word, at around 7, I took a shower and danced in the restroom. HAHA. It's soo embarassing to say it here on Multiply but it's true. When I get upset or depressed, the 5 things that could make me happy again is God, my friends, dancing, ice cream, and chocolates. :] So, when I finished taking a bath, they arrived. My mom went directly to my room and asked me where I was going. I was still mad at her so I wasn't answering. She got irritated so she finally said to me that starting Monday, she won't give me my allowance and it was up to me as to where i'd get my money. I didn't care. I still went to church. When I arrived, the first one to approach me was my bestfriend. He asked me whether I felt fine 'coz he thought there was something wrong 'coz I looked sad and weary. I said to him that my eyes wouldn't look that sore if everything was okay. He knew I wasn't ready to talk yet so he just left me and said that he'll be back. After our church activity, I started to relate to everyone what happened that day and everyone was trying to comfort me and I felt so touched so I started to tear up again. But it was short-lived and easily ended. We were supposed to go home and something unexpected happened so we ended up going home at around 11. I wasn't expecting someone to get mad at me 'coz my mom already said to me that she doesn't want me to go home anymore. Then when I got home, my grandmum reprimanded me and said that i'm learning soo many bad things from my friends and my grades are getting affected. So I was like "my grades went up!!! can't you see that?! and why are you always blaming my friends?!" I knew I was shouting and crying at the same time . F*ck! I hated being weak in front of them. Yet, they stopped reprimanding me after I walked out on them. She left me in my room and I positioned myself on the foot of the bed and did not sleep beside my mom. I put on my earphones again and put the music on. I was crying silently eventhough the song playing was "Single Ladies - Beyonce, Beautiful - Akon" and I was soo defenseless. It felt as if no one was there for me and everyone at home was ganging up on me. I had no one to talk to. I cried hard. When I couldn't take it anymore, and there were no tears coming out of my eyes anymore, I texted my friends [trish, nel, and my bestfriend- jem] and I slept at - I think - 1am. I woke up when my mom was searching for her skirt inside the dresser and I figured that she was going to church. But I wondered why would she go to church early in the morning . [Cause she usually goes to church at noon] So I slept again. When she was gone, I positioned myself at where I was really supposed to go to bed to and slept again. I woke up when she got home and I slept again. She took a bath and when she was finished, I woke up again. I figured she was going elsewhere again and didn't mind. I just took a bath - 'coz after all, it was time for me to go to church again . I went into the restroom and took more time than I expected. When I was finished, she'd already left. I arrived at church very late. And they were joking me that I should've never come. HAHA. But the only one who asked me about what happened again last night was my bestfriend. [shux. my bestfriend is l♥ve. :)] He asked me if I got reprimanded again and if I was already okay. I answered yes to both uestions even if the second yes was unsure. And the rest of the day was a bliss for me 'coz she wasn't in the house and I still had a lot of money . :)
I posted this blog for the people asking me what went wrong yesterday and why I was soo emo earlier [my GM said so] and it's originally written for ate ching only. But I decided to share it with all of you so I hope i'd get your advices . :) Thanks for reading!!